The Tales of Sailor Yamato and Tuxedo Tai!
by Yamato's Tiger Lily
Summary: Yamato is a drag queen superhero, bent to save the world from the evil Queen Sora, from the Real World who wants not only HIM, but this mysterious tuxedoed bishounen as well...


**The Tales of Sailor Yamato and Tuxedo Tai!**  
By Lily-Chan 

**Chapter One**  
I Ain't A Drag QUEEN! 

**Genre**: Humor/Romance  
**Rating**: R -- Transformation, Sexual Situations, Language, Crossdressing, and um. Violence :D And...Gennai....**IN A NEKO OUTFIT** Nuff said XD;;  
**Summary**: Yamato is a drag queen superhero, bent to save the world from the evil Queen Sora, from the Real World who wants not only HIM, but this mysterious tuxedoed bishounen as well...  
**REMEMBER!**: I don't own Digimon NOR Sailor Moon. Need I say more?! u.u; And um. MAJOR ASS HINTINGS TO HOMOSEXUAL-NESS. AND SORA BASHING :D So um. If you are the opposite, please LOOK AWAY as the readers enjoy it :D And please don't point out mistakes. ; I'm not that confident. And it's taking a lot of balls for me to post this fic! 

It was just an ordinary day for mild-mannered Ex-Digidestined of Friendship, Yamato Ishida was sitting down on the hot, hard, and sticky bleachers of the school's "Cocky Jock Field", as it's famous for. He was wearing green **long-sleeved** school uniform in the weirdly hot spring day. "Whew..It sure is hot outside!" Yamato said, wiping the obvious sweat on his forehead. He put his arm around his sensitive forehead to keep the sun out of his beautiful blue eyes, eagerly watching for someone. 

"Hey Tai! Watch your head, you damn FOOL!" yelled a teamate of Tai. Tai glanced up from a daze to be greeted by a soccar ball in his face. It pushed him over the bench where he was wiping his sweat from running everywhere on the field. "Uggh.." as he slumped back with his sore back. "Owww!" he bellowed as he tried to get up. "Ha! That's what you get for not paying attention!" as he got the ball back from the fallen captain. "Hmph. I still don't know why they call **you** the Team Captain!" he snorted as the coach blew the whistle. "Okay! That's enough practice for tonight. Don't forget that the tournement is next week! So if I were you, I wouldn't do anything STUPID..", as he glanced at Taichi then back to the players, "that will cause you to miss it!" The players said they're goodbyes and talked about their plans for the rest of the night. But Taichi went straight to the bleachers whereas waiting his really good friend. 

Yamato was amazed on how it was 6:30 in the **evening**, in the SPRING and it's still light! "Jeez, and it's only March!" he cursed under his breath. He gathered his things which was a bit warm since it was sitting there for about TWO HOURS straight! Yamato sighed with a little sigh bubble. "Oh well..at least his practice is over!" he looked around for his friend. Soon he spotted Taichi, smiled really wide inwardly as Taichi walked up to him. "Hey Matt! I'm sorry practice went a little longer then expected!" he nervously laughed. "Nah it's okay Tai. So what did you want to ask me?" blinked Matt, completely oblvious. 

"Oh! Um..shoot...I forgot!" Tai laughed nervously. "_Of course...what did I expect? A love confession!? I know Tai isn't like that..._" Matt pouted. "Oh..it's okay! Let's go out for ice cream..before they run out! I'm a bit hot!" as he pulled his collar. He felt some steam coming out of it. Jeez, the weather channel never mentioned this atrocious heat! Soon, the two walked up to the ice cream which was bombared by a bunch of people, demanding ice cream of different flavors. 

"One at a TIME, people! I'm not a freaking octupus!" yelled the ice cream man on the top of his lungs. The crowd died down and all you could hear was the ice cream man's voice and the person that was up there. Taichi sighed. "Look it looks like we'll be here for a while. How about we go to my place? Since you're staying for a week." as he started to lead the way to his apartment building. Yamato did a double take. "_Wait...Since **when** is Taichi thinking **logically**!?!? Oh shit...And here I am...Acting like a **FANGIRL**! This heat...DAMN THIS HEAT!_" 

Soon they made to the building. "Here we are!" exclaimed Taichi, back to his idiotic self. "_Whew! I was getting worried there!_" Yamato sighed, relieved. Matt smiled cutely at his friend. This is just what the doctor ordered. Literally. Yamato was being overwhelmed with stress from his band and the fact they're getting ready to go to the States to host a MTV Spring Break show. And his physcian, as Jyou loved to be called, prescribed to spend time with friends and family before they were to leave. 

"We're home!" Taichi chimed in the empty apartment. "Oh yeah! Kari had that...science thing at school. Oh well. Come on in, Yamato!" as he tossed his soccar bag on the Lazy-Boy his dad frequently sits in. Remembering where his room was, he went towards it and tossed his books on the ground and put his duffel-like bag on the ground. Meanwhile, Taichi was in the kitchen, looking for some kind of nourishment. Sadly, all he found was **HEALTHY** food his mother have. "Ohh!" Taichi grunted, getting frustrated. Then he saw a sticky note on the fridge that said: 

"Taichi, we'll be out for a few hours. So we'll be home **quite** late. On the counter is money for pizza, rental movies ( NO PORN! ), and ice cream if you need some.  
Love,  
Mom & Dad. And Hikari"

Taichi pouted when he read that he couldn't rent porn, but then again, he's pretty sure that Matt wouldn't be interested since he's in a band and there's **LOTS** of hawt groupie sex..."Hey Matt! I'm going out for ice cream. I know your skin is sensitive in the hot sun, so yeah! What kind of ice cream do you want?" he yelled through the hallway. "Huh? Oh, um...strawberry please! If they don't have any, then I'll have whatever you bring." Yamato shouted in return. "Okay! Be back in a few!" as he grabbed the money and ran out. 

Yamato was relieved he was gone. He can finally change into his house clothing, which was house clothes he had brought since he was going to stay for a week. It was a grey tank top with a grey pair of shorts. "_Thank Kami-San that my legs are shaved! Otherwise, this would be **VERY** awkward!_" he thought as he put them on. It was an hour before Matt decided to get worried about Tai. There wasn't a sign of him, or anyone for that matter since there was a **terrible** storm. He was scared, for two reasons.  
1. He hates being alone during a storm  
2. Out of all places.... 

He hung around the living area, hoping for someone to come home, but no one came through the door. But there was a big crash in the computer room. Startled, Yamato squeaked. "_Goddammit._" as he slapped himself. "Get a grip on yourself, Ishida. You're almost 18! An adult!" and so he convinced himself that even though he's gay, he's a gay **ADULT**! So he collected himself and went towards the noises in the computer room. The door was closed so Mr. Yagami wouldn't be bothered whenever he was in there..plus it's a habit in this household. 

He opened the door slightly and inside of it was a blinding red light. Matt blinked a few times before his eyes got used to it. He saw a pair of black ears with a small crescent moon and a tail. He blinked and sweatdropped. He knew Kari LOVED cats, but...this is **NOT** KARI! The dust had cleared enough to see through it. 

"GENNAI!?!?!?! WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU WEARING!?!?" Yamato yelled on the top of his lungs, head against the wall, scared shitless. "Oh this? Ah-haha! Don't you think it's cuuuute?" as he acted like he's a little chibi girl. Yamato felt a big sweatdrop in the back of his head while Gennai was **trying** to pose. Later on, poor Matt looked like he was dying thanks to that unpleasent images Gennai had bestowed onto him. "Why....me.....?" he managed to mutter out. "Oh yeah! Now I remember why I'm here!" as Gennai zapped Yamato, thus shocking him. 

Once Yamato regained conciousness, he found himself in a blue sailor outfit, with a tiara, blue jewel, and it had the Crest of Friendship in it. He had white gloves, and bluek knee-high heeled boots. Then he felt hair in a ponytail with a masquerade-like mask which was also blue, and I guess you could say "easily" hides his features. He also felt a bit of wind up his butt. "Gennai...why did you give me a skimpy ass skirt?! And you know I'm GAY, but I'm not going through **THESE** measures to get laid by Ta--um....LAID AT ALL!" Yamato ranted at the little man. "Well Yamato--" squeaked the neko-dressed man. "I bet it's because you wanted to see me in a fucking skirt...RIGHT!?!?" he interuppted him. "Errr umm.....MY! Quite a storm we're having!" he said, looking out the window to block his mental images. Yamato was NOT happy. So he grabbed Gennai by the tail, which was attatched to him, apparently and yelled in his face in a threntening tone. "If you don't give me back my clothes..." as he scurried for a pair of sissors. "You can kiss your tail AGAIN!" "No, no! ANYTHING BUT THAT!" wailed the old man. "Then tell me what the HELL is going on!" he demanded. 

"Okay okay! Just put me down!!" Gennai begged. So Yamato did what he asked him to do. "Ah..okay. You see, there's a **new** threat to this world and with the help of the fluffy Digimon mascots, other Sailor Scouts, and a Mysterious Bishounen that you know SOMEHOW, you can save this world!" Yamato gave him a glare. "This is somethng out of a cheap ass shoujo story isn't it?" "NO IT ISN'T! NOW GO ALONG WITH YOU FUU OTHERWISE I CUT **IT** OFF!" boomed a highly annoying pitch. "......................So how do I find these 'Sailor Scouts'?" he asked Gennai using the quotes. "You don't find them, they're right underneath your nose! Well. I can't spoil any more! Otherwise the author's going to murder me. Soo...HAVE FUN!" as he jumped back into the computer. 

Soon there was no more storms or anything bad. Yamato was back in his house clothing and Taichi poked his head through the door, since, evidently, Yamato closed the door. "MATT! You bastard. I called you about 100 times! What were you doing, looking up porn?" Tai waggled his eyebrows. This was the last straw. Yamato pushed Taichi backwards. "Shut up, you dork. And give me my damn ice cream, biatch." he said as he crossed his arms with a tint of blush in his cheeks. 

Later that evening when Yamato was getting ready to sleep, he was going through his belongings until he saw that sailor fuku he had on earlier. "AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" his voice echoed throughout the city.......unaware of the CERTAIN DOOOOOM they might encounter! 

**Author's Notes**

  
Um. How can I explain this? XD; It all started with a picture of Kenshin of RK in a Sailor uniform...and...I was hyper...and I was talking about Digimon with my friend Sari....Yeah. XD Just so you know. This is just going to be updated whenever I feel like it XP So nyah on you! Um. Sorry if I destroyed your brain :D So um. Yeah. 

-cuddles a Sailor Yamato plushie- SHOO! Why are you still reading this!? XD;;


End file.
